Urban Dictionary defines shred betty as "a cool female snowboarder of exceptional ability."
It is not a word that describes my powerfully anxious snowplowing like an Alpine do-not down the bunny slope, however, have you seen my daughter, 7? She's like 80s slang.
She's was like tubular down the hill behind our house on her first run, a thing of magnificent balance and whizzing speed arms outspread as if to the X Games born. Blizzard of '15? She's like, Gnarly.
On her second run of her life, like ever, she nailed a bunny hop over a pile of ice her brother, 9, built up to scare her, and she stuck the landing at the base of the corn field and continued on, run after flawless run, all afternoon.
Her face, framed by this outrageous pink and rhinestone snow puppy hat was beatifically glowing, saint-like, "Take that," she said, I think the comment was directed to the hill, but maybe also to injustice, and to the nonsense that we'll never have a female president in America.